I Have My Life Together, But Ladies Aren’t Interested. Are They Threatened?

Reader matter:

While I was more youthful (I’m 27 now), I became a jerk. I lied, cheated, made use of medications, don’t care about my look, didn’t come with ability or knowledge, had been of shape. And females ADORED myself.

I are in possession of a great job, an extensive circle of friends, a fit human body, imaginative skill and razor-sharp garments. I’m good-looking, truthful, nice, understanding, informed. Since I’ve become my life together, ladies don’t seem very enthusiastic about me personally at all.

Are ladies endangered by myself? Will they be turned-off because it’s me personally repairing me personally, perhaps not all of them? Would ladies like jerks?

-John (Maryland)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Dear John,

We smell one thing slightly fishy.

When you paint a common picture of exactly how some women with a nervous attachment design get activated by inconsistent terrible men, Im some suspicious that women are rejecting you since you are now a good guy.

In fact, I’m also slightly skeptical that you might have undergone a personality and ethical improvement of such magnitude in such a brief period of time.

Issued, kicking a medication practice can alter a person’s character, so your story are completely true.

Or simply you will be nevertheless inside “working really, really hard adjust” period and are usually feeling a tiny bit resentful that most the smoothness building you’ve got done is going undetected.

One particular spot to drive that resentment is toward women who tend to be ignoring you.

Kindly know one of many issues that takes place when someone cleans right up their own existence and gets a brand new task is they enter another peer team, one which might bring some social anxiety.

You stepped up to a new category, son. Congrats. And there are very different social rules for the reason that league.

My personal advice: Wait and watch. Then you’ll know precisely ideas on how to act whenever right kind of girl comes into your own radar.

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